ALONSO TO THE RED SOX?

Well, Pete Alonso has officially packed up his bats and walked out of Queens — and honestly, who can blame him? After being treated like an afterthought by the Mets last offseason, the Polar Bear decided to bet on himself, and spoiler alert: he won. He’s declining a $24 million player option because apparently, hitting .272 with 38 home runs and leading the National League with 41 doubles earns you the right to shop around. Go figure. Also, good for him.

According to MLB Trade Rumors, Alonso sits just behind Kyle Schwarber and Japanese slugger Munetaka Murakami as one of the top power bats on the market — which is basically a polite way of saying “someone’s about to overpay him, and it won’t be Steve Cohen.” Alonso is reportedly looking for a seven-year deal this time, because after the Mets’ lukewarm courting last winter, he’s not just dating for fun anymore. He wants commitment — and maybe a front office that actually calls him back.

Bleacher Report’s Tim Kelly tossed out a spicy prediction that the Red Sox could swoop in, especially with uncertainty surrounding Triston Casas’ knee. Kelly suggests Boston might “replace Alex Bregman with Pete Alonso,” which is interesting. But hey, the idea of Alonso mashing bombs over the Green Monster is fun to imagine for Red Sox fans — especially if it means sticking it to the Mets from a few hundred miles north.

Now, I’m not exactly in the Pete Alonso Fan Club, but even I can admit the guy deserved better from the Mets. The problem last offseason wasn’t just the Mets’ indecision — it was Scott Boras. The super-agent nearly froze Alonso out of a long-term deal by overplaying his hand, dragging out negotiations so long that even Steve Cohen admitted the talks were more exhausting than dealing with Juan Soto. And when Steve Cohen calls something exhausting, you know it’s bad.

In the end, Alonso did what smart players do — he's choosing peace, freedom, and the open market. Maybe he’ll end up in Boston, maybe somewhere else. But one thing’s for sure: wherever he lands, he’ll get paid, he’ll hit dingers, and he won’t have to pretend he enjoys answering questions about the Mets’ “future direction.”

Stay tuned — the Polar Bear’s about to find a new cave, and this time, he’s charging admission.