Wednesday, April 23, 2014
MICHAEL PINEDUH!
Michael Pineda won’t be sent down, HE’LL BE SENT TO SCHOOL!! I will first say to all the Yankee hating, self-righteous fans attacking the Bombers’ # 1 idiot, YOUR PITCHERS ALSO USE PINE TAR! Yes, even your team breaks the “No Pine Tar” rule. So grab a seat in your glass house and put down the stone. You have no leg to stand on.
Now back to Pineda. Unlike the countless number of MLB hurlers that use a bit of the sticky stuff to get a better grip on early spring evenings, Mikey was dumb enough to make it obvious beyond obvious. He should have just taken George Brett out to the mound instead of his glove, winked at John Farrell and yelled, “Hey! I’m going to use pine tar tonight!” Seriously was this kid dropped on his head?
The towering right-hander was already under the microscope after being caught with a foreign substance on his hand during his last outing against Boston. Did he think, “Maybe if I make it so blatant they’ll completely miss it? Maybe if I wear it on my neck in plain sight they’ll figure there is no way I could be that dumb.” No, Mikey. We all now KNOW you are that dumb. In fact were setting up a spelling contest between you and Yasiel Puig and I am betting heavy on the Not-too-bright Dodger outfielder.
I also have to take the WHOLE YANKEE TEAM to task on this one. It’s like being a parent and stopping your goofy kid from wearing two different shoes on the way out the door to school. Everyone in road grey HAD to have seen the giant smudge of tar on Mikey’s neck. Why not stroll over and say, “Hey, Big Mike, maybe lose the large jar of pine tar on your neck. It’s just a thought. Your call at the end of the day, but I think they might be able to see that…FROM SPACE!!”
I am just utterly disgusted in Pineda. Not only did he make himself look awful but also he is going to be suspended 10 games for sure…and I’d toss in 2 more for absolute stupidity. He is the CY Young of dumb dumbs at the moment and it’s a shame considering all he went through to get back to the Big League level.
I wish I could go on and on about this, but I am really at a loss for words. I’ll just sit back and listen to the sports world bash Michael Pineda and the Yankees. They have them dead to rights this time around.
** Here’s an old classic about being a moron by RUN DMC. Way to go Mikey.**
--Mike O'Hara, MLB Fan Cave Host, Season 1
Twitter: @mikeyoh21
"Paulie was always my favorite player."
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