AN OPEN LETTER TO MY OLDEST SON

Sometimes a kid needs the big picture... I just went through this with my own. Think big ladies and gentlemen... and never let your children walk away from their dreams, no matter how hard or frustrating it gets. Believe.

Hey Kiddo,

I know, I’m your dad.  I’m the guy who doesn’t get it, right?  But trust me, I do. I was 11 once.  Let me state first, that you’ve already accomplished more in your young life than I ever did at 11 years old.  You did it because you enjoyed what you were doing, were pushed alittle to try, and along the way, you gained confidence and courage to try different things. That in turn allowed you to climb the steps of life.  I struggled at your age. I was afraid. I didn’t have guts.  Sure, mom and I teach you to try to work toward a goal, but it’s you that enters a room full of judges and faceless kids and tries out for a team or activity, over and over again.  I know... We always tell you that if you do your best, good things will happen. And I know that lately, that's not happening, and I get it, it's frustrating, but you're a tough kid and sooner or later, it will all work out. I promise. In the back of your mind you're probably wondering why you keep listening to us, right?  Well, I think you listen because ultimately I think you get it.  

Life isn’t easy. Baseball isn’t easy.  No one hands you the starting pitching role or the full-time shortstop position, unless that team is absolutely sure you can handle it.  They want to give you a look.  Heart alone doesn't get you the job.

Now, I watch you and I see a kid that wants it more than any kid out there. You have true heart and guts kiddo, but working toward it, practicing just alittle more, could help you get over the line.  You won't be the kid "right there" anymore. You’ll be the kid consistently nailing it.  There are many with talent, but none with heart like yours.  Your situation is unique… and I guess that's me being biased, but with talent, heart, courage and ambition, you will get there.

You’re something else, you know that? You may feel down after a failed tryout, but you’ve made me the proudest father around.  Remember when you tried out for catcher for that club team? They liked you, but you competed against a kid much bigger, with a much stronger throw to second. It's OK, you did your best and you pulled it off easily. Remember when you tried out for that club team 3 times, only because they “wanted to make sure” you had the stuff? You did… and you made it.  You can accomplish anything… but as you achieve one goal, you’re faced with new challenges and you suddenly have a new goal staring you in the face. Then, you have to keep working. It's a vicious cycle, isn't it? But that's life... that's baseball.

I know, I know… it’s exhausting.  I remember you saying to me once, “I just wanna be a kid.” You broke my heart, but let me tell you something... you are. You working hard now only gives you the strength and determination to go further in life later. Mom and I would never take your childhood away from you… we just know that you love the game of baseball, and sometimes even the simplest disappointment can make you discouraged. We get it, trust me.  I guess this post is just to tell you that we all get discouraged sometimes, but you need to step back for a moment, think of it as a puzzle and then execute. Think it through. Think, enter, fight, conquer and win. We know you can, and I know that in that exhausted little frame of yours, you know you can too. Climbing the mountain is 1 thing… staying there is something else.

There’s an expression: “No rest for the weary.” That means you must keep persevering no matter how tired you are. You don’t quit when you have the desire to accomplish goals. You’ve accomplished many, but it doesn’t stop. Sure, I probably should have been upfront with you the first time you “won”, but I was hoping it would stick. The truth is, champions aren’t born, they’re made and you’re making it happen, but you need to keep making it happen.  

I’m not the loud dad on the sidelines yelling at you to run faster. I’m not the one telling you that you’re a failure.  I am the dad telling you what you COULD be if you believe in yourself. I don’t do it carelessly. I do it with love. Think big. I know, it’s scary to do new things. It’s frightening to try out and attempt to conquer something you never thought you could conquer. But you brought home 3 A's from school this week, didn’t you?  You were in the Spelling Bee, almost to the final round… and you’ve excelled all winter in that wonderful game called baseball. Winter Training was the last thing on your mind, I remember you thought maybe you'd "take a break", but you did it anyway. Guess What? You’ve become stronger because of it. I know, you don’t feel any different, but you now have an extra step running down the line. You now are little more graceful in the infield.  And now you've even added a pitch to your arsenal.  New challenges, check. New victories… check.

Finally, know this… I love and adore you. There is nothing better than seeing my oldest son’s face light up after a big moment.  Remember those 2 runs you knocked in to tie it?  Huge hit, and a big win followed and you contributed. Remember batting lead-off for me all season?  Being our starting pitcher, winning the championship?  I do. I remember all of it. And I remember your face... it was priceless, and that’s the best feeling in the world for me.  I see that and I know you're happy.  But the best part is this; when those moments happen, you’re not thinking, you’re just doing.  You’re treating it like a game, you’re having fun… you’re not putting pressure on yourself.  That’s when you’re at your best… and that’s the secret that no one seems to get.

Have fun with it. Baseball is called a "game" for a reason.  Prepare, study, practice, do whatever it takes, but know that in the end, with the right approach, you will accomplish your goal...always!  Sure, it's never easy, but also know this… you’re not alone.  Mom and I are always there, so are your mentors and so is your team.  You’re courageous… You’re ambitious… and you are loved. Never quit on yourself and you will win... I promise. 

Go get um kid.

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