LUKE WEAVER IS OUR CLOSER, BUT BOONE ISN'T ALLOWED TO SAY THAT

At this point, Aaron Boone isn’t managing a bullpen—he’s managing egos, contracts, and front-office PR. And it’s painfully obvious he’s not the one calling the shots. Boone’s become little more than a ventriloquist dummy with a pinstriped hat, parroting the company line on Devin Williams while Luke Weaver is out here dominating like Mariano Rivera reincarnated.

Let’s break it down. Weaver just locked in his third save of the season and is obliterating MLB hitters. Here's his stat line, and try not to drool:

• 0.00 ERA

• .063 AVG against

• 0 HR allowed

• .234 OPS against

Yeah, those numbers lead all MLB relievers. And in case you missed it: he hasn’t allowed a single earned run in nearly 15 innings. The guy’s untouchable. He’s striking out batters, freezing them with fastballs on the black, and high stepping off the mound with more energy than a Red Bull factory.

So of course, the Yankees want to... give his job back to Devin Williams?

You’ve got to be kidding.

Williams, bless his heart, couldn’t handle the pressure cooker that is New York to start the season. He got rocked, demoted, and still somehow gets treated like the golden goose. Why? Because he’s got a shiny contract? That’s the hill the Yankees want to die on? We’re talking about a bullpen, not a charity foundation.

Boone, ever the loyal mouthpiece, said this gem when asked if there’s a timeline for Williams to return as closer:

“The good news for Devin is, he has everything to get through this and come out better from the other side.”

Translation: “I was told to say this.”

Let’s be real. Weaver is the guy. He’s earned it. And any team with an ounce of competitive instinct would recognize that. But the Yankees? They’re over here trying to fix what’s not broken, and baby-wrapping what actually is. Weaver’s been a revelation, and instead of riding the hot hand, they’re trying to reset Williams’ confidence like it’s a Nintendo cartridge from 1997.

Newsflash, Yanks: this isn’t Little League. You don’t get closer-by-seniority. You get closer-by-results. Luke Weaver is getting results. And until proven otherwise, he should be the one slamming the door in the ninth.

Leave what works alone. Weaver’s your closer. Everyone else? Just trying to keep up.