SOMETIMES CONFIDENCE STARTS WITH A BUNT

I’m not the type of dad that stands on the sidelines and yells at my kids to sprint down the line.  It’s quite the opposite.  I’ll stand in the woods, yards away, because I’m convinced if I’m there, they feel my presence and don’t perform to the best of their ability.  It’s true… I know it.  I have missed games because of work, only to hear about the "bomb my son hit" and "I should have been there.” “Yup,” I think… “But it was almost better I wasn’t.”  

I'm superstitious.  As a kid, if I hit well with 1 bat, I’d use that bat until there were no hits in it. Then I would never use it again and find another lucky bat.  Now, we all know it’s the hitter that hits, not the bat, but as a kid, you need all the help you can get.  As an adult, as a coach, if we win, I’ve made it clear that there is no uniform washing allowed.  Let’s just say during our 8 game winning streak last season… the dugout stunk something awful… but the kids were engaged and it made for a nice run.

Luck and superstition is only part of it. Believing you "CAN" is the other part. Now, I speak about this a lot here.  I have kids in sports and they become timid around groups of people.  There’s arrogance among kids and sometimes it’s brutal, to the point where my kids just don’t want to participate because they don't want to hear it.  As my oldest matures, he sees right through it, and while it hurts inside, he puts his best game-face on, puts on his cap with a perfectly straight brim and runs out onto the field.  It’s no longer about what kids say about him to make him feel bad… it’s what he believes he can do out there.  I think that has something to do with my wife and I.  In fact, I hope it is... that means we’re raising him right. But don’t get it twisted, I’d still love to ring the necks of those snotty kids.  Obviously, I won’t, but that’s the "parent circling the wagons" mentality… you’ve been there, I know you have.

I was never an aggressive kid in sports and I never had much confidence to speak of.  I was nerdy, quiet, glasses, braces... you name it, I had it. And there was 1 more thing... I didn’t believe "I could."  My parents helped build me up, but it was 1 coach in little league that will for ever be my savior.  He’s long passed, but the idea that he put in my head gave me such confidence, it brought the ball player out of me, and it later threaded my life.  Having good mentors is a great thing.  My dad and mom have always been there, but it was this 1 coach that taught me how to bunt that made me into the biggest sensation on the field every game…at least in my head. It was confidence… and it worked.  “You want confidence?"  I heard him telling his assistance coach, another father in town, "You bunt.”  

He walked over one game.  The kid pitching was bringing heat, and I remember it was a night game. I also remember I had no chance.  My coach walked over, he looked me in the eyes as I stood terrified in the on deck circle and he said, “You’re a fast kid, so if you need to bunt, do it and run your ass down the line… they won’t catch you.”  I'm paraphrasing now... it was a long time ago, but I remember the message. 

I stood in the box and the first pitch was pure heat, a whopping 40 mph.  BALL 1.  “OK,” I thought, “3 more and I get on base.” Then I looked down the first base line.  Coach touched his ear and then made the bunt sign with his hands.  He clapped and yelled, “Come on now… confidence!” 

It was my trigger word. Like Pavlov's dog, the pitch came in and I stuck my bat out.  I remember it dribbled down the third base line, but I don’t remember much more because I ran like hell. “SAFE!” the umpire yelled. I did it.  I was freaking out because I actually made it on base without walking or getting hit by a pitch! I did it.  That was kind of a big deal.  My coach whacked my helmet and I stood on the base, not exactly sure what was going to happen next.  As the pitched looked over at me, I was ready to “run my ass off", as my coach told me.  He threw his next pitch and it went to the backstop. “GO!” said the coach… and I did. It was no longer a matter of the coach hiding signs from the opposing team at this point, it was making sure I got some confidence.  I slid into second base.  I stole my first base.  Shortly after, I did it again.  This time though, the catcher threw down to third.  My third base coach yelled at me, “Call time out… don’t move!” He was in on it too. I called time and stood on the base.  I’ve never made it to 3^rd at this level of play… I was in no-man’s land now.  

The next batter came up the plate and hit me home.  I walked across the plate and walked into the dugout.  I did it, I finally did it.

Bunting built me up and I did it a lot that spring.  Over time, my confidence was high. I was getting on base, using my speed and soon enough, I was swinging the bat, even getting a hit now and then.  I worked through my fears, I built up my confidence and that confidence, no matter how strong or tall I was, got me through High School ball.  I was on the level and I was good! And I used the same tools I used on the first that night in Little League.  Believe in yourself…. And you want confidence? Bunt.  I finally understood what my coach was saying all those years later.  It’s the little things.  Build up your confidence and you will feel invincible.  But it’s the baby steps you make that take you there.  It takes practice, it takes failure, but in the end, it’s all the little things that will build up your confidence.  You will achieve your goal… not all at once, but over time… it can happen.  

I’ll never forget that coach.  It was a valuable life lesson and it has literally carried me through life. I know I can do anything these days.  When I see something that doesn’t fit right, I know I can make something that will fit. If someone tells me there's "no way" to do it, I know there is. Oh, You need a picture of a nice landscape for your wall?  I’ll take one for you.  Oh, you don’t think I can climb that mountain? Guess what... I’m gonna do it.  And this is my favorite...    “You’ll never make Bleeding Yankee Blue a legitimate website!"  Really? 

Guess what else I just did.

Confidence is key. You need some? It starts with a bunt. 

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